Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
