so explain again why im purple
no
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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