My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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