Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
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i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
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one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
so much tequila, so little girl.
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