Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
