Christians are straight up FREAKS
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
