i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Your penis caused this!
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
