Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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