why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
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