ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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