i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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