I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
