There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
