My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize