Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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