worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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