You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Never joke about your clitoris.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
