Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
