Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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