Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Randomize
