My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize