He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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