hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I skipped work to stalk him.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.