My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
