is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
