just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
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