watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
why is half of my head shaved?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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