Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
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She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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