I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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