Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize
