Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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