i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
