Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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