i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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