Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
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