Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize