worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
