Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Rumble strips road head = magical
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Randomize
