turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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