I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
We just shotgunned beers for America
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize