i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
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