just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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