I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
