what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize