I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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