News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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