I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
