Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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