The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
