Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
